Weblog
In my continuing campaign to convince everyone that California reigns supreme above all other states in this fine union (and that Southern California in particular ought to be everyone’s eventual place of residence), I pondered a few things that seem to benefit from substantially longer lives in The Golden State due primarily to differences in climate between the coasts.
In all seriousness though, any further insinuations on my part that California is in fact “better” than your own state or loser-colony may be dismissed as false. I am only kidding.
Sort of.
Cars
I do not understand the notion of both living in a wintry climate and owning a luxury sedan. I see Beemers, Benz’s, Audi’s, and handcrafted whachamacallits trudging through the snow and mud, and I wonder, Why, of all places, would you choose to bring such a fine piece of German engineering here? As snow and all its associated vices already wreak havoc on everything else outside, such judgment seems to undermine the craftsmanship of the vehicle and the sanctity of the luxury indulgence.
Shoes
While it’s a fact that it is snowy and windy and generally just miserable on the East Coast, the weather isn’t the only reason why shoes tend to fall apart faster. In California, we drive. We simply walk less, and that means less punishment on your kicks. Less slush, less grime, less corrosive salt, less wear and tear in general. You would think that walking less would make us fat, indolent slaves to our automobiles, but if obesity is a fair measure of physical unfitness (maybe not), studies show that Californians are easily not among the least fit in this country. Yay, Deep South!
We are, however, polluting the atmosphere with our automotive exhaust. That nastiness hovering in the air around downtown L.A. is not a happy thing.
Except when it makes the sunset all orange and pretty.
Non-Depressive Mental States
It almost becomes something worth caring about when you realize that gray skies and colder weather mean less outdoor time, which means less light, which means seasonal affective disorder (maybe). Unipolar depression because you aren’t getting enough sunlight? That’s just unfair.
Why then, Alex, are you living on the East Coast?
… Shut up.